Every week we catch up with whoever is headlining Club NME @ KOKO to find out about their ultimate Friday nights. This week, it’s Storms, and they’ve got a funny tale of two for you!
What do you usually do on Friday nights when you’re not providing the entertainment at Club NME?!
Felix: We’re usually providing the entertainment somewhere else! Or terrorising some other establishment to the best of our ability.
Yacob: George djs at a couple of venues on Fridays and Saturdays so we sometimes go where he is but you can’t go to the same places every weekend. Well, you can, but you’ll become part of the furniture. Not literally, of course. That would be mental.
What’s the closest you’ve got to a weekend that could have been straight out of The Hangover?!
Yacob: I’ve never seen that film but I’m assuming it is about the night before the hangover, rather than a film about some laid up bloke with a headache?!
Felix: George used to put on this 90s club night which was pretty mad. After it finished once, we all piled into this cab, hammered, to go to a party and the girl in the front passenger seat kicked the windscreen while “dancing”, the cabbie phoned the police, so we all did a runner and then all got arrested. Somehow Yacob managed to appease the police and they gave us a lift to the party which finished as soon as we got there because the neighbours had phoned the police! So we all went to my house and had a merry old time in my attic.
What are your ultimate Friday night party jams?!
Yacob: So Lonely by The Police or She Don’t Use Jelly by The Flaming Lips.
George: This Friday I wanna hear The Thermals – Returning To The Fold, Crystal Waters – Gypsy Woman, and Kinks – ‘Til The End Of The Day!
Felix: Everyone’s a Winner by Hot Chocolate, Dancing With Myself by Billy Idol, Best of my Love by The Emotions
What are you drinking – do you have a tipple of choice?
Felix: When we were skint on tour last year we had to be economical, so we invented this lovely drink. For some reason all we had one night was Monster energy drink Ripper, so we had one each and all drank half of the can. Then we filled it back to the top with the cheapest whiskey we could find, which is always High Commissioner. In the early stages it was pretty much undrinkable but something corrosive in the Monster completely masks the taste of any whiskey after 20 minutes and it just tastes like Monster again. So we’d start one brewing every night before we played and then drink it as soon as we came off stage. Because of the Monster it ended up being called Mongjuice. It will be on our rider.
Yacob: It’s absolutely lethal and I’m ashamed to talk about it (but also a little excited).
George: I love a bit of Mongjuice!!
How long do you spend looking in the mirror before you’re ready to hit the town?!
Felix: Probably too fucking long.
Yacob: Probably not long enough…
George: Sometimes I make the effort, other times I leave the house looking like Frank Gallagher!!
You’re at a club, where can we expect to find you – loitering at the bar, throwing some shapes on the dance floor, chatting someone up, sitting in a corner?!
Felix: On the dance floor pretending to be an airplane.!
Yacob: On the dance floor, moving people around to make space for a runway. Once Felix has taken off and is up in the air, i’ll start harrassing the DJ, asking him to play Stevie Wonder.
George: Sitting in the corner, sweating profusely, spitting and cursing at everyone.
You’ve just left the club and you’re looking for a 4am snack, what’s your go-to post-club grub?
Felix: Chicken shish extra spicy followed up with a peanut butter lion bar or kit kat chunky peanut on the way home… maybe a fried egg sandwhich before bed.!
Yacob: If we’re getting food I’m having a lamb doner wrap bathed in mayonnaise.!
George: Halloumi Wrap!
Who’s the most famous person you’ve ever spotted on a night out?!
Felix: Santa Claus, attacking someone with a bag of crisps. It’s not easy being santa.
Yacob: …or attacking people with bags of crisps. There really are much better weapons available
Nowadays. I once got attacked by a kid on a bicycle. The kid just drove into me and fell over. Didn’t really think that one through, did he?!
George: Liam fucking Gallagher at a Lee Mavers gig in The Old Blue Last. Had a little 5 minute chat with him too, top man and he looked immaculate!!
What’s your best/worst journey home story? Ever got stranded in the middle of nowhere?!
Yacob: I actually woke up in a bus station in Cheshunt last night. Falling asleep on night buses is one of my many impractical talents.
Felix: The night bus is the bane of my existence, if there’s one place I’m guaranteed to fall asleep, it’s on a night bus. I woke up once in Croydon or near it and I’d had my phone, wallet and glasses nicked. I can’t see anything without my glasses, so I had to walk really slowly close to the wall until I got to a garage where I tried to explain I couldn’t see anything (literally, I can’t make out bus or street signs above eye level). I asked the geezer behind the counter to call the police but he wouldn’t, so I banged on the glass until he did. Finally they arrived and I tried to tell them I’d been robbed but they were having none of it, they thought I was just battered so they arrested me and dragged me off to the station. I had to ring my dad to explain to them I’m technically blind.
George: Too many times have I fallen asleep on the night bus… About two months ago I got on the N55 from Tottenham Court Road and woke up on Oxford Street nearly two hours later!!
Worst Friday night injury – Frinjury, if you will?
Felix: I don’t get injured. I’m a ninja.
Yacob: I once lost a fight with a Chinese bloke from a chip shop. I say I lost “a fight” but what really happened was that, in a slightly inebriated state, I thought it would be fun to jump over on his side and help him serve his customers. This resulted in him and a couple of his colleagues chasing me half the way down Old Street. When I stopped to tell them that they were overreacting, he kung fu kicked me in the face, thus breaking my chin. It was rather impressive, actually. I suspect George has had quite a few injuries; his ankles are made of glass…!
George: Yeah, I sprained my ankle really badly on the KOKO dance floor, funnily enough. This is why I don’t dance!